


i've been afraid of changin', 'cause i built my life around you

by biggestharrie



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Amazing, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Babygate (One Direction), Barebacking, Bodyswap, Bottom Harry, Canon Compliant, Daddy Kink, Eventual Smut, Female Harry, Feminization, Genderswap, HAHA THATS A TAG, Kinda, M/M, Mention of Nick Grimshaw - Freeform, Mentions of Taylor Swift, Pining, Rimming, Very slight tho, Woke Up A Girl, also mentions of anne twist, but i skip over the detailed stuff ladies, i don't know what to tag this omg, implied heterosexual content, like harry literally wakes up as a girl, ok here we go, there's some hetero action
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-16
Updated: 2017-06-16
Packaged: 2018-11-14 18:28:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 15,391
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11213748
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/biggestharrie/pseuds/biggestharrie
Summary: the one where harry wakes up and discovers he's in a female body.





	i've been afraid of changin', 'cause i built my life around you

**Author's Note:**

> hiiii! this is actually the first fic i've ever finished, and i actually started it two nights ago. there's probably a million grammatical and spelling errors, so i'm super sorry in advance. 
> 
> this is the ultimate grand supreme of guilty pleasure fics, i'm so sorry.

“Same lips red, same eyes blue, same white shirt, couple more tattoos…”

When his team decided that Two Ghosts should be the next single, he’d been more than hesitant. The song was too close to him, and to have to repeatedly swerve the questions regarding Taylor Swift would be too much. He would’ve preferred Kiwi or Only Angel as the next single. Something actually fun and lighthearted to perform and promote.

“Tastes so sweet, looks so real, sounds like something that I used to feel.”

He made sure there wouldn’t be a crowd for this performance. Yes, he’d performed the song before but this was different. This was big, everyone was waiting for this performance to find out what the next hit from Harry Styles would be. He had checked Twitter a few hours prior, which turned out to be a huge mistake. They were all expecting Woman or Kiwi.

“We’re not who we used to be, we’re not who we used to be… We’re just two ghosts standing in the place of you and me…”

It had be to intimate, was the thing. If he couldn’t choose the next single, he’d choose the way he’d announce it to the world. He had his band with him, along with the filming crew and of course, James. It was a small gathering, but at the same time, he was so exposed. He was outdoors, singing about mending his broken heart.

He was quite literally shouting it from the rooftops.

“I’m just trying to remember how it feels to have a heartbeat.”

He felt lightheaded, struggling to return James’ embrace once the song was over. The guitar nearly slipped from his fingertips. A man signalled that they were no longer filming, and Harry finally felt himself breathe normally. It would be a while until he could breathe like that, since all the Taylor questions would be jumping at him for the next few weeks.

“Here.” Mitch handed him a water bottle, which he accepted graciously.

The next hour was kind of a blur. After shaking hands with faceless people, he was rushed into a car that would bring him to his home in London. It had been a while since he’d spent time there, but he had a team that made sure his plants didn’t die. The past month was spent in numerous hotel rooms all over the world. A bit of familiarity was very much needed, thank you.

He swung his duffle over his shoulder and once he thanked his driver, he approached the gate. He entered the code, watching the doors swing open. The house wasn’t big or anything, but after the incident four years ago, a gate was definitely required. 

“I’m home,” he announced to the empty foyer as he dropped his keys into the dish by the door.

_”Hazza!”_

_Harry squeaked as Louis came barreling into his arms, jumping up and wrapping his legs around his pudgy waist. He littered his face in kisses, covering the entire area except his lips._

_“I only went to get milk,” Harry said slowly, the plastic bag dropping to his feet so he could hold onto Louis’ thighs instead._

_Louis just scoffed and cupped Harry’s face in his hands, making sure to squeeze his cheeks. Harry made extremely unattractive faces, which didn’t really matter because Louis was laughing to himself._

_“Still missed you, silly. ‘Twas lonely without you.”_

Harry opened the door to his bedroom, everything exactly where he’d left it. He dropped his bag by the closet and began peeling off his velvet suit. A shower was so tempting, but he wanted nothing more than to crawl between his sheets. Yeah, a shower could wait.

He slipped under the duvet, feeling his bones relax against the cool fabric. He always slept naked, always felt most comfortable with nothing restricting him. Even back when he lived in a house with four other boys, he chose a more nudist lifestyle. Louis never complained, not even when they got their own place. He always accepted him, even the weirdest bits. 

There were large floor-to-ceiling windows adjacent to his bed, which allowed the moonlight to flood into the room. His sheets were illuminated by the starlight, and just before he closed his eyes, he could’ve sworn there was a flash of movement across the night sky.

Whatever. It was probably a plane. Harry hummed softly as he wiggled his toes, and then finally he fell into a deep, dreamless sleep.

****

The windows always seemed like a good idea until morning. The sun had apparently decided its main goal was to make sure Harry didn’t sleep in, not even past 10 o’clock. It was his day off, but once he squinted and felt his way to his windows and pulled down the blinds, there was no way he could fall back asleep.

So he decided to get on with his day. What that entailed? He had no idea yet, but that was the beauty of a Day Off.

First, a shower.

_”And I never thought through love we’d be making one as lovely as she, but isn’t she lovely made from love,” Harry sang as he scrubbed his underarms with his favorite frog loofah._

_Suddenly the curtains were pulled back, causing him to scream and clutch his loofah to his chest. Louis burst into delighted laughter and stepped into the tub, taking the loofah away from him._

_“Honestly, Harold,” he began with a signature eye roll. Harry was still holding his breath, counting the few inches that separated them. “You’re supposed to cover your bits, not your nips.”_

_Harry finally remembered how to breathe when Louis reached over and twisted his nipple. “Owww,” he whined in a weak attempt to mask the twinge pleasure that warmed his body. “Lou, this is my shower. Get your own.”_

_Louis shot him a smirk as he shampooed his hair. He no longer had that ridiculous bowl cut. Their stylist, also named Lou, had given him a feathered cut suited for heartthrobs. It definitely made Harry’s heart throb. And other places._

_“How could I take a shower when I know that we are in the middle of a water crisis right now? That is just selfish, and I won’t stand for it. You also sounded quite beautiful, by the way. I’m a bit tired of hearing Isn’t She Lovely, though. Why don’t you give me some Britney?”_

_Harry smiled so widely that he had to bite his lip just so his face wouldn’t split open. Louis still noticed and dug his soapy finger into his dimple. They sang Toxic until they couldn’t stand the lukewarm water._

Harry turned the hot water on, vision still adjusting to the bright lighting of his bathroom. He stepped inside the narrow stall once the temperature was to his liking. He reached for his favorite coconut and papaya shampoo, which was stocked in all of his homes, and as he lathered up his curls, a frown suddenly settled on his lips.

Curls?

He pulled one of the strands, his heart beating too fast for this to be a dream. The curl stretched out to at least fifteen inches. His hair had never been that long, not even the moment before he cut it. He grabbed the rest of his hair, eyes widening when he held a fistful of long, thick waves. 

Then he looked down. 

And then he screamed.

He screamed because he saw nothing. He simply saw his toes. There should’ve been his cock laying against his thigh, or sometimes even perpendicular depending on the morning… But it was gone. There was just… skin. He reached down, but before he could touch the area, he let out another scream.

Because holy fucking shit, he had… He had tits. And they were quite nice. He cupped them, giving them a tentative squeeze and jumping a bit. 

Shit. 

He stretched out his arms, noticing that all of his tattoos had vanished overnight. All of the muscle he’d worked hard to gain over the past couple of years was also gone. His arms were now thin and elegant. His fingernails were grown, and though his fingers were still long, his hands were no longer mammoth sized.

“This is a dream,” he said to himself, which was an awful idea because his _voice_. 

“My name is Harry Styles.”

Oh _dear_.

Though it still had a raspy quality to it, his voice was most definitely feminine. He spent five minutes washing his hair, something that should’ve taken two but long hair was far too much work. And he thought his long curls from last year were high maintenance!

He turned the water off and approached the sink slowly, careful not to trip over his feet. It was weird walking now, like his hips were fuller and it was just natural to sway them. He took a deep breath, and after counting to ten, he wiped the mirror clean with a towel.

He screamed for the third time, but this time, he watched himself do it. He could see his even fuller lips part. His eyes were staring back at him, the same shade of green, but even wider and lined with longer lashes. He looked almost like Gemma, but… It was him. Him, as a… a Woman.

It felt like a sick joke, and he couldn’t help but laugh hysterically. Someone was pranking him, that had to be it. Some possessed fan had slipped a drug or potion into his drink at the Late Late Show and it took effect when he fell asleep. All because the new single wasn’t Woman. It was kind of clever, actually.

Harry giggled softly, quickly getting used to his new voice. He ran into the bedroom then, not bothering with a towel, and stood in front of the full length mirror. 

He was around the same height, but his legs looked even longer now that they weren’t as muscled. He had… hips, and a narrow waist, and a soft tummy. He stared at the soft-looking hair that covered his pelvis, transfixed for a moment, before he turned slowly in front of the mirror. He looked over his shoulder, mouth forming an ‘o’ when he caught sight of his behind. It was fuller, more shapely and perky even. He gave it a test wiggle.

He was in trouble. This was some deep, deep shit. 

But when he placed his hands on his bum and let his hands move up and down his (this was his, right?) body, he remembered that this was his big Day Off. He didn’t really need to figure this out right away. 

And so he ended up standing in front of his closet, with quite a dilemma on his hands. His very dainty hands. His eyes flickered towards his little Gucci collection, the suits and blouses all carefully hung. No, they were all personally tailored to his old measurements. They’d look weird and even a little tacky on his new body.

Then he looked over towards his more casual attire. His jeans were certainly out of the question. He wished Gemma stayed over more often, knowing they’d be around the same size. 

“Guess this will have to do,” he mumbled, talking out loud mainly to get used to his new voice. 

He dressed in a pair of joggers he had stolen from Louis years ago but never remembered to give back. They’d remained buried in his underwear drawer since. He went through all of his shirts, huffing when he saw all of the ‘L’s on the labels. He was probably more of a small or medium now, a size he hadn’t been since he was sixteen.

He finally threw on an old white off brand t-shirt. He skipped back to the mirror and planted his hands on his hips as he studied his reflection. Not too bad, though he definitely needed to go shopping if he wanted to actually have fun that day. His big Day Off.

The initial horror had finally faded and was replaced with something lighter. He was actually _giddy_ with the knowledge that he could literally go outside and do anything he pleased without getting photographed or approached.

He was literally free.

Just as he was going through his shoes, which was an even bigger issue, the doorbell rang throughout the whole house. If the doorbell was ringing, that meant the person had gotten through the gate, which meant that it was most likely Gemma. 

Gemma. If it had been any other day, and he had a penis, he would’ve been absolutely delighted to see his big sister. However, he did not have a penis, so he was quite literally fucked. He couldn’t ignore her though, so he tiptoed down the stairs, taking them one at a time. 

His sister was never a patient woman though, and soon she was knocking on the door. “Harry, I know you’re home! Mum told me you’re staying here, so let me in!” she yelled, never caring if the neighbors could hear.

He stood in front of the door, able to see a slightly warped version of her silhouette through the frosted glass. He tucked his drying ringlets behind his ear and took a deep breath. 

When he opened the door, Gemma barely bat a lash.

“Hi, is my brother awake?” she asked, glancing at her fingernails. “He’s going to have one hell of a hangover, so be a dear and put a kettle on, hm?”

Harry instantly narrowed his eyes, offended she believed he had a drunken shag the previous night. Though, after that particularly emotional performance, he was surprised he hadn’t drowned himself in tequila and found someone with big blue eyes to take home.

“Gem, it’s me,” he said, nose wrinkling at the voice that came out of him. “Wait, get inside.”

He tugged her into the foyer by her sleeve, ignoring her string of profanities. He dragged her into the living room and plopping them down onto the couch, then turned to face her. He held her hands, giving them a squeeze.

She was beginning to look a big freaked out, bless her.

“Look, I don’t know who you are, but I’m-”

Harry huffed and covered her mouth with his hand. His much tinier hand. “Gemma Anne Styles, shut up for one second! I know I don’t look like… Well, I’m a lady, but it’s actually me, Harry. I was born on February 1st, 1994 at 12:06am. My favorite color is cerulean, I hate caramel, and I have photos of you making out with Stacy Plotkin from your Sweet Sixteen.”

Gemma’s eyes widened even more, so he took his hand away from her mouth.

She still wasn’t convinced. “H could’ve told you all of that last night. Also, that’s a load of bullshit, the thing about Stacy Plotkin,” she added, eyes narrowed. “You’re not my brother. He was just on television last night. Boys don’t magically become girls overnight… That’s crazy, and you’re probably crazy, so you should just leave.”

Harry groaned and gave her a pout. “Ask me something! Anything. I swear on Mum’s life that I’m telling the truth. I have no idea how this happened to me, Gem. You think I like having boobs?”

Gemma just raised a brow at that, causing Harry to furrow his brows. 

“You do look a lot like him,” she finally admitted, her eyes scanning his face. “And me, actually. It’s kind of creepy. Your skin is way too naked without your tats.”

He was about to let out a sigh of relief, but then she said, “Show me your birth mark.”

“Do we really have to do that?” he asked, huffing softly. 

She nodded and gestured for him to stand. He shot her a dirty look and stood up. Once his joggers were pooled at his ankles and the hem of his shirt lifted so that his bum was exposed, she finally believed him.

“Well, fuck!” she practically squealed, standing up and bending to inspect his behind. “Harry, you’ve gotten yourself into quite the pickle. Honestly, if someone were to magically become a girl overnight, it would be you. Also, we’re gonna have to get you panties.”

Harry yanked his pants back on. “I don’t want panties,” he lied.

She saw right through it, naturally, and picked up her purse. He smiled warmly when he noticed that it was the Saint Laurent shoulder bag he’d gotten her for Christmas, the one she thought was too posh.

“We’ll skip brunch and go shopping,” she decided, reaching into her lovely bag and pulling out a hairbrush. “First, let’s do something about this mess. Can’t believe your hair is finally longer than mine, you knob.”

“Miss my knob,” he mumbled longingly as she assaulted his curls.

****

“Can’t believe you wear a bigger cup size than me!” Gemma complained as they walked through the lingerie shop.

They’d been shopping in the downtown shops all day, which should’ve been exhausting, but Harry was having the time of his life. Nobody had approached him, not once. Gemma had actually been stopped by a teenager, an encounter he watched amusedly whilst eating a soft pretzel.

“It’s not like I’m going to wear a bra. Those things look so uncomfortable,” Harry remarked, shuddering when he saw a particularly strappy one on display. He set down his shopping bags and traced the silk of a pretty pink thong. 

“So, do you think this is, like, permanent?” Gemma asked, grabbing random pairs in Harry’s size. “Because you kind of have two world tours coming up, H. Your fanbase is composed of 90% heterosexual girls who tweet me that they’re going to be my sister in law.”

He snorted and picked out a few pink pairs, then walked up to the register to pay for everything. 

“I have until tomorrow morning to figure it out,” he realized, digging out his wallet from his brand new Gucci handbag. He’d changed his clothes in one of the shops, now wearing a pair of tight black jeans (now in his much smaller size), an embroidered floral shirt from Anthropologie, and a pair of white Vans. He’d gotten the slip-on ones, which made Gemma roll her eyes.

“What’s tomorrow morning?” she asked as the sales girl swiped Harry’s credit card and began to bag all of the underwear.

“Going on Nick’s show to promote the new single,” he replied, sighing when he remembered that he’d have to talk about Two Ghosts. Nick was surely going to tease the shit out of him about the obviously-Taylor lyrics. 

She didn’t invent red lips, he thought bitterly. Plus Louis didn’t need lipstick.

Gemma took the bag, since Harry was already balancing five. “Well, I hope your dick comes back soon or you’re gonna have a lot of explaining to do.”

They left the shop then, discussing where they were going to have their late lunch, when Gemma suddenly stopped in her tracks. Harry was about to question her, but then he followed her gaze and felt all of the air inside his lungs escape his body. 

“We’re leaving,” Gemma immediately said, grabbing his arm. “Now.”

“But-” Harry looked over his shoulder, eyes transfixed on how tan he looked even though it was just barely June. “Gem, please, I haven’t- I haven’t seen him in so long. Not since his X-Factor performance, and even then, we weren’t alone. Please.”

He was practically begging, not even looking at his sister. He was far too focused on the man across the street with a cigarette between his fingers and his phone to his ear. 

Before Gemma could answer (or pull him away and take them across town), Louis spotted them. He instantly ended his phone call and oh god, Harry watched as a face-splitting grin dominated his face. His eye crinkles were visible, even from where they were standing, and Harry felt weak in the knees. 

“Oh, fuck, he’s coming,” Gemma mumbled under her breath, letting go of Harry’s arm. “You’re my cousin. Uh. Fuck, shit, Harriet’s an ugly name and way too obvious… Erm, Hima!”

“Hima?” Harry questioned, turning his neck so fast.

“Yeah, my flatmate’s dating this girl named Hima, and she’s super cute. Like you can think of anything better,” she whispered violently, but then all of a sudden, she was all sunshine and smiles. “Hey, Louis! Fancy seeing you here.”

Louis grinned at Gemma, but then his focus was shifted to Harry. “Who’s this? Have you and Harry been keeping a third Styles sibling from me?”

And holy shit, Harry was positive he was going to pass out. He’d always wondered, back in their X-Factor days, what would’ve happened between him and Louis if he was a girl. Would he have dumped Hannah for him? Would they be together now, raising Freddie together?

Gemma elbowed Harry so hard he dropped his shopping bags. “Sorry,” he quickly apologized, but Louis was already picking them up. 

Harry was absolutely swooning.

“Thank you,” he said shyly, taking the bags and biting his lip when their knuckles brushed. “I’m Hima, Gemma’s cousin. Just visiting her in the city for the day.”

Louis cocked a brow, causing Harry’s heart to flutter. He just looked _so_ good, with a few days worth of scruff. He was even in his black Adidas joggers and a place white tee with the same brand’s logo. Louis’ brand. LouisLouisLouis.

“You’ve done quite a bit of shopping,” he speculated, eyeing the bags before looking up at Harry again. He tilted his head to the side a bit, resembling a confused puppy. Harry was so in love. “Are you sure we haven’t met before? You look so familiar… Your eyes…”

Gemma shook her head, never one for subtlety. “Nope, definitely not. She’s, um, she’s been studying in Man U the past few years, barely ever visits. I had to beg her to spend the day with me and H.”

Louis’ eyes seemed to brighten at the mention of Harry. Actual penis-swinging Harry. Hima-Harry huffed softly, wanting Louis to look back at him. But at the same time, his heart warmed. Maybe Louis did miss him as much as he missed him. Well, maybe not as much.

“How is Harry?” Louis asked, looking around the street. “He’s not here, is he? I’ve been meaning to call him, let him know he’s absolutely smashing it. Been listening to the album on repeat. Hima, are you alright, dear?”

Harry had stumbled into Gemma, causing her to glare at him. “Had one few too many mimosas at brunch,” Gemma said easily, forcing out a laugh and helping Harry to his feet. “Anyways, yeah, he’s killing it. He’s back in LA right now though, doing some promo and all. I’ll let him know you said hi.”

Louis nodded slowly, still eyeing Harry carefully. “You’re sure you’re okay, love?” He reached out and touched his arm, his fingertips light against his skin. “Gem, not all of the Styles can handle their liquor like you.”

As Gemma smirked, Harry smiled to himself.

_”I want more t-taquito… No, that’s not the word… Louis, lemme!!”_

_It was just after their Boston show of their Take Me Home tour, and they’d just returned back to the buses after a swim at the lake across from the arena. After drying off and the other boys deciding to spend the night on the other bus with the band (Josh had challenged Niall to a Mario Kart battle), Louis had brought out the alcohol._

_Harry wasn’t legal to consume alcohol in the states and he’d told this to Louis, but of course, his older and more deviant best friend was never one for silly laws._

_So here they were, tucked away in Harry’s bottom bunk (Louis always wanted the top), with a large bottle of tequila between them. Harry tried to reach for the bottle, but Louis was always faster. He held it behind his back, now kneeling on the mattress._

_“Nope, you’ve had way too much,” Louis decided, though Harry couldn’t take him seriously with his underwear over his head._

_“You’re not the boss of me, Lou-weeeee,” Harry slurred, giggling and then gasping when he hiccupped. “Lou! I hiccupped!”_

_Louis suddenly wrapped his arms around him, squeezing his waist and burying his face into his shoulder. “You did, pumpkin! And I’m so proud of you!”_

_Harry burst into giggles, never wanting to stop giggling. He felt so light, like he could do anything and everything without nothing bad ever happening._

_“Proud enough for a kiss?” he asked, lips puckering._

_Louis lifted his head up, and pretended to contemplate for a few seconds. Harry whined, ever so impatient, and pulled Louis’ fingers away from where they’d been tapping on his chin._

_“Wanna hear you beg for it,” Louis decided, taking a rather large gulp from their shared bottle._

_Harry’s cheeks were already splotchy from the alcohol, but now he was firetruck-red. He reached for the bottle, Louis giving it to him easily this time, and drank until he couldn’t stand the taste._

_“Please kiss me,” he started, crawling closer to Louis even though there wasn’t much space left between them. It still wasn’t close enough, it never was. So he fell into his lap, clumsily swinging a leg over his waist. “Pretty please, your lips look very shiny right now, and I want mine to be shiny too, so you should just-”_

_“Do you always talk this slow?” Louis interrupted him, and oh, Harry hadn’t even felt Louis hold onto his waist. But look at that, he was holding onto his waist!_

_“Hm?” Harry hummed, distracted by the fact that Louis was, in fact, holding onto his waist._

_“Oh, for god’s sake.”_

_Harry suddenly felt pressure on his lips, and after a second of shock, he decided it was definitely a nice pressure. He didn’t know if tequila could cause a late reaction, but his insides were suddenly warm and… and… fluttery? But he didn’t need to throw up._

_“You’re kissing me,” Harry breathed against Louis’ thin lips. “Wait, I didn’t say to stop. Keep doing that.”_

_Louis pinched one of his love handles. “Kiss me back, you dick.”_

“What do you say, Hima?”

Harry blinked and looked between Louis and his sister. They were both staring at him expectantly, though Gemma looked a tiny bit more fed up. 

“Louis was wondering if we wanted to join him for drinks tonight. I have a deadline coming up, so I can’t, and I thought you and I were going to stay in tonight,” Gemma informed him, shooting him one of those death glares she loved so much.

Drinks? With Louis? Alone? 

“Yes,” Harry instantly said. “I’d love to.”

If looks could kill, Harry would be very dead. 

Louis didn’t seem to notice the steam coming out of Gemma’s ears, though. He was too busy beaming, like Harry had just given him the best present. Harry hadn’t seen him smile like that since he performed Just Hold On, and even then, it had been a bittersweet occasion.

“Let me get your number then.” Louis handed Harry his phone, and that was when Harry finally realized the deep shit he’d gotten himself into. Louis already had his number. 

But he didn’t have his work number. Harry quickly entered the number and put his new fake name with the peach emoji. He was still rather proud of his brand-spankin’ new bum. Spankin’. Bum. He giggled, which Louis must have taken as a sign of flirtation and not Harry laughing at his own pun, because he winked.

“I’ll call you later,” Louis promised, and it seemed like he was going to hug him, or maybe even shake his hand, but he simply said goodbye to them and went on his way.

“He winked at me,” Harry said in a daze when he and Gemma were finally sitting down for lunch. “He actually winked at me.”

Gemma thumbed through the menu, not even bothering to make eye contact. “He winked at Hima, not you.” When she looked up, her face softened. “Harry, this is a bad idea. I care a lot about you, and that’s why I think you need to stay away from him. Do I need to remind you about what happened when you found out about Briana and the pregnancy?”

Harry’s shoulders slumped. His eyes lowered to the menu, eyes tracing the patterns of the letters. “No,” he said softly. That had been the night that truly squandered any hope Harry had that Louis would come around, and maybe, just maybe, realize that he was in love with him too, and not in fact straight.

“So you’ll stay away?” Gemma asked hopefully after they’d given their orders to the waiter.

Harry was about to say yes, but then his purse vibrated against his chair. He frowned and reached for the bag, wondering how girls carried these things around all day and actually remembered not to leave them behind somewhere. He pulled out his personal phone, but there weren’t any recent messages, so he fished out his work phone.

“Still can’t believe you carry around two.” Gemma rolled her eyes and sipped her iced tea.

“It’s more organized that way,” Harry argued before looking back down at the screen and seeing a text from an unknown (it wasn’t actually unknown, considering he had Louis’ number memorized) number. He quickly gave him a contact name.

**13:20: Hey it’s Louis ! Cheeky emoji you picked ;)**

Harry nearly dropped his phone. 

“Gem, he’s flirting with me,” Harry said, horrified as he looked at his sister.

She scoffed and reached for a breadstick. “Babe, he was fucking you with his eyes the entire time we were talking.”

Harry’s cheeks suddenly felt hot. “Really?” he squeaked. “Do you think he’s into me?”

Gemma just grumbled into her iced tea, which made Harry do a little victory dance in his chair. He quickly typed a response, feeling more confident over text.

**_13:22: You called the bum emoji cheeky!!_ **

**13:23: Hahahah shut it!! You do have a nice bum though ;)**

Harry squeaked a soft, “Thanks,” to the waiter when their food arrived. Gemma settled for shooting him the occasional glare as she ate her club sandwich, making her disapproval well known. Harry didn’t care, for nothing could bring him down. 

Louis thought he had a nice bum.

And Louis was the _King of Nice Bums_. 

Harry felt honored.

**_13:26: Thank you, can’t say I didn’t notice yours ;)_ **

**13:37: Love a woman who appreciates my arse ! So what are you up to, luv?**

**_13:37: At lunch with Gem. I’m having a kale salad and a kiwi smoothie!_ **

**13:40: ….KALE??????????? Ugh gross nvm our date is cancelled goodbye**

**13:40: just kidding. But ew ! I thought you had better taste than that**

**_13:41: I’m going out with you, aren’t I?_ **

**13:43: That you are, luv, that you are :)**

“I’m five seconds away from taking your phone away,” Gemma announced, reaching out to pluck the device from Harry’s tight grip.

He quickly tucked it into his bag, huffing softly. “Leave me alone, I’ve been waiting for this for seven years,” he told her. He hadn’t realized how hungry he was until he took the first bite from his salad, and he immediately wished he ordered something heavier, especially since he would be drinking that night.

Harry finally said goodbye to Gemma around four in the afternoon, after they finished their lunch, dropped off Harry’s bags at home, and then took a stroll around the park. Harry just wanted to enjoy fresh air without having to fly to some remote island or be on a yacht somewhere. It was like rewinding back seven years, and being sixteen again.

“I need to go meet up with my editor. You’ll be okay if I leave you here, right?” Gemma asked after glancing at her phone for the time. 

Harry was lounging on the grass, stretching his legs out and enjoying the breezy afternoon. “Mhm, I’m perfect,” he confirmed, smiling when she pecked his cheek. “I’ll call you later.”

She gave him a pointed look. “You’re going out on a date with the love of your life tonight, and you have a vagina. You’re calling me, or I’m kicking your ass.”

Harry blew her a kiss, and off she went. He hummed to himself and dug his phone and earphones out of his bag. He scrolled through his Spotify and played Catish and the Bottlemen’s latest album.

Just as one of his favorite tracks was starting, a shadow fell over him. He frowned, since he was trying to soak up as much sun as he could. The frown quickly vanished when he saw who exactly the shadow belonged to.

Louis plopped down onto the grass beside him, a football on his lap. “Are you following me, peaches?”

And oh, Harry was certainly not blushing. Definitely not.

“Definitely not,” Harry said once he found his voice. “You’re sure you didn’t come for another look at my peaches?”

Louis burst out laughing, and Harry bit his lip, grinning. He gasped softly when Louis reached over and stuck his index finger into his dimple, twisting it slightly. “You’ve got dimples,” he said fondly. “Harry’s got them, too. So lovely.”

Harry sat up a bit straighter at the mention of himself. “That’s the thing about genetics… Kinda run in the family,” he joked lightheartedly which earned a beautiful snort from Louis. “Are you and Harry close, then?”

Louis sighed at this, his whole demeanor changing. He ran his hand through his hair and began fiddling with the football. “Not at the moment, no,” he confessed, not quite making eye contact. “We used to be proper mates though. Even lived together. Can you believe his mum let him live with me just when he was sixteen? Ridiculous.” He smiled fondly. “But when Harry wants something, he gets it.”

Harry pouted a bit. He wanted Louis, yet he didn’t have him. So that couldn’t be the truth.

“But, uh, after the band split, we all kind of lost contact,” he continued with a shrug. “And I have a son now, so I split my time between him, the studio, and my family in Donny.”

Harry nodded, moving a bit closer to Louis and placing his hand on Louis’, which was resting on the football. It was so strange, seeing how his hand was now _smaller_ than Louis’. Weird. A bit unnatural, even.

“I’m sure he understands how busy you are,” he told him, giving him a sweet smile. Louis looked at him, and for a moment, Harry felt like they were talking to each other, as in he was in his own body and Louis was still okay with the touching. Just like old times. “He’s probably really proud of you, how you’ve been holding up despite everything. I’m really proud of you, Lou.”

Louis continued to stare at him, his expression unreadable. Then he moved his hand from under Harry’s, only to place it over his and squeeze tightly. 

“Thank you, Hima,” he said genuinely, looking so soft and even vulnerable for a split second. “You know, you look so much like Harry. Your eyes, really. They’re gorgeous.”

Harry was still freaking out over the fact that they were holding hands. In public. In a public park. Where somebody could stumble upon them, and he could easily be labeled as Louis Tomlinson’s new girlfriend. Holy fuck, he was Louis Tomlinson’s new girlfriend. He could’ve sworn he read somewhere that Louis was apparently back with Eleanor, but apparently not. He tried not to smirk in victory.

“My eyes?” He rolled his eyes playfully. “Your eyes are like my favorite shade of blue.”

Harry didn’t miss the way Louis’ cheeks reddened and the way his tongue darted out to lick his lower lip. It was a shame; people needed to compliment this man more.

“Every time I try to be cute and give you a compliment, you keep giving me one back. First, my bum and now my eyes.” He shook his head to himself, and gave Harry’s hand another firm squeeze. “You’re truly gorgeous, though.”

And it was then that Harry began to feel a teeny bit bad about his situation. Not necessarily bad… Just, he was _jealous_. He was jealous of this fictional cousin, Hima, whom Louis thought was gorgeous and could publicly hold hands with. He wanted to be going on a date with him as his boy self, cock and all.

He really missed his cock.

“Hey, what’s wrong?”

Louis was suddenly cupping his face, and it was hard to breathe. Harry managed though, and avoided his eyes. He needed to tell him, confess everything, but he just couldn’t. Not after seven years of this game of hide and seek with their feelings.

Plus he didn’t think he could tell Louis he had magically become a girl in a public park.

“I’m just a bit tired,” he lied.

Louis did his iconic eye roll and lightly patted Harry’s cheek. “You and Harry are the worst liars. You’re lucky I’ve gotta run to a meeting, love.”

Harry could’ve sworn he imagined Louis kissing his cheek before he got up and jogged away, giving him one last glance over his shoulder before disappearing. But when he reached up to touch the tingling skin, it was slightly damp.

****

Harry let himself properly cry when he got home.

He was curled up in bed, naked of course, and a blubbering mess. It just wasn’t _fair_ , how Louis seemed to be into him the moment he had tits and a curvy bum. For a few sad moments, he truly wished that he was born a female so that he and Louis could’ve had this so much earlier. He would’ve been spared so much heartache.

But as he pulled the duvet tighter around his body, he realized he wanted to be Louis’ boyfriend. Not his girlfriend. There was a huge distinction, and he needed that.

**18:02: Picking you up at 9 ! You’re staying w Gem right?**

Harry sniffled and wiped his eyes, hating the way his new long hair stuck to his wet cheeks.

**_18:03: I’m actually at H’s. Do you want me to just meet you at the bar?_ **

**18:03: Nah I’ll come over! Can’t wait to see u xxx**

Harry chucked the phone to the other end of the bed, feeling his heart crack in half for the hundredth time in his life. This was worse than that time he’d been stuck behind Louis and Eleanor during one of their ‘dates.’ This was worse than when he found out Louis had gotten a one night stand pregnant. This was even worse than Louis not inviting him to the little party held for Freddie, when all the other boys had gotten a phone call.

_Even my phone misses your call, by the way._

This was worse, because this was the closest he’d ever gotten when it came to him and Louis’ relationship. It was the closest, yet Harry felt like Louis was more unattainable than ever. He had him, but at the same time, he didn’t. Hima did. Not Harry.

Fuck Hima.

After another half hour of sulking, the growling in Harry’s tummy forced him out of bed and into the kitchen for a snack. Since his lunch was so unsatisfactory, he dipped some Oreos into his tub of Biscoff spread and ate them just like that. 

_”Harry, you need to call him,” Gemma whispered, kneeling down by the couch where Harry was lying. His head was resting on his mother’s lap, his face streaked with an endless flow of tears and his nose bright red from the constant sniffling. “Please, just talk to him. Don’t you think you’ve let him hurt you enough?”_

_Harry shook his head quickly. “No! He’s never hurt me, ‘s’not his fault! He-He just… I’m so stupid,” he sobbed as Anne carded her fingers through his curls._

_“Sweetheart,” she said softly, looking down at him and hating that she couldn’t help Harry. She’d tried, for many years, even tried to set him up with a lovely lad from down the street, but it was pointless. “I think Gem’s right. It’s been nearly six years, dove. You need to move on with your life, whether or not it includes Louis.”_

_Gemma was nodding along, but Harry wasn’t having it. He just bit his lip, trying to keep it from trembling, but it was pointless. He covered his face with one of the decorative little pillows and screamed into it._

_“Does he even know her?” he could hear his mother ask Gemma._

_“No, they just met at a club one night. The photos are trashy. People are demanding a paternity test.”_

_He drowned them out with his sobs, not wanting to hear about how the man he’s been in love with since he was sixteen was now having a baby. He was going to be a father to some lucky child, and Harry wouldn’t be a part of it. Louis was already starting a family, a real family, without him._

_“How could he do this to me?” Harry finally asked after what felt like an hour. His mother and sister hadn’t moved an inch though. Anne was still petting his hair, and Gemma was still by his side, making sure he didn’t drown in his own snot. “He doesn’t even know her.”_

_Gemma scoffed and looked like she was about to say something, but Anne shot her a look._

_“He… He didn’t even tell me,” Harry whispered, eyes staring into the ceiling._

_They were in Harry’s hotel suite in Holland, where he’d been filming for Dunkirk. Filming had finished early that day, and he had a couple of days off so his family had come down to visit. He had been picking up groceries from the corner market when he saw The Sun article right by the checkout._

_**Niall: Can u believe Lou’s gonna be a dad ???????** _

_And that was all the confirmation he needed._

_There was nothing more Anne or Gemma could possibly do or say to make him feel the slightest bit better. Nothing would change the fact that Louis was in fact going to become a father, and that he hadn’t even bothered to tell Harry._

_“Please, Harry, please call him.”_

_Harry tore his eyes from a rather awful stain on the ceiling and looked up at his mum. It hurt him to see how upset she looked, but he just couldn’t bring himself to do it. He couldn’t call Louis, not when Louis clearly didn’t want to speak to him. Louis didn’t even want him involved in his life._

_“I can’t.”_

All of his shopping bags were sitting on his bed, and it was actually kind of awful seeing how much he’d spent when he didn’t even know how long he was going to be like this. It really was smart of Gemma to convince him not to go into Gucci, since he could finally rock the women’s apparel.

He carefully unpacked all of his new clothes and tucked them into a spare drawer. They were going for drinks, so he’d have to go with a more casual outfit. Casual was never his strong suit. His outfits were either for the gym or for the runway; there was no in between.

Finally, after nearly half an hour of pairing an infinite number of combinations, he made up his mind. He’d gone with another pair of skinny jeans, these ones just as tight but more distressed with rips at the knees (Harry admired the way his bum looked even bigger for five minutes) and his old Rolling Stones tee from when he was seventeen. He even rolled up the sleeves, just like he’d done years ago. Of course, he slipped on a pair of suede chelseas. And if he had slipped on a pair of soft pink panties, that was only for him to know.

He looked good, he decided as he spun around slowly in front of the mirror.

He even looked like himself. Just with longer hair and boobs. And an ass.

Just as he was packing up his bag with whatever he’d need, the doorbell rang. 

_He’s early. He’s never early._

Harry squeaked and hurried up, his mind drunk on the fact that Louis still remembered the code to get past the gate, even after all these years. Granted, he probably had it on his phone or even texted Gemma, but the thought was nice.

When he got to the door, he should’ve calmed down a little at least, but he was just so anxious and excited that he opened it instantly. And wow, he didn’t regret it a bit.

Louis was standing there, holding sunflowers (which had just gone into season) and looking so handsome. He was in jeans, which Harry hadn’t seen him wear in any of his latest pap photos, and a loose black graphic tee. He always looked so good in all black, and Harry couldn’t help but grin.

“Are those for me?” he asked, looking at the flowers only for a moment because Louis was far prettier.

“Nope, they’re for Harry,” Louis teased, and if that was supposed to make him jealous, it didn’t work. It only made his heart beat faster. “You look really good, by the way. Is that, uh, Harry’s shirt?”

Harry took the flowers and went to the kitchen so he could put them in water. Louis trailed inside like a puppy, his eyes wandering throughout the house. They hadn’t been in his home like this for years, and a lot of the decor had changed since then.

“Hm? Yeah, I just borrowed it,” he said as he filled a vase with water. “Thank you, by the way, for the flowers. Sunflowers are my favorite.”

“Harry’s too,” Louis said so quietly that Harry almost believed that he made it up. But when he glanced over at him, he was looking down at his feet. “Has, uh, Harry mentioned me? I’m not sure how often you guys talk, so I really don’t expect-”

Harry cut him off, setting the vase down and plopping the flowers inside. “All the time,” he said firmly, leaning against the countertop and watching Louis carefully. His own heart was beating like a drum, unable to _fathom_ the fact that Louis was asking about him. “He’s told me about how you’re his best friend, and how much he truly admires you. He misses you.”

So much.

Louis blinked in surprise, and then he shook his head. “I seriously doubt that,” he mumbled, shaking his fringe from his eyes and then plastering on a fake smile. Harry could easily tell which of his smiles were fake, had become an expert, since Louis was first forced to bring Eleanor everywhere. “Anyways.” He cleared his throat. “Let’s get going, love?”

Harry decided to drop it and just nodded, adjusting the strap of his bag over his shoulder.

****

Louis didn’t bring Harry to a bar. Nope, he brought him a _club_.

They breezed past the long line that wrapped around the block, Louis holding his hand and taking the lead. He was a familiar face in the club scene, always promoting and making appearances, so it was pretty easy getting past the bouncers by the door.

“Alright, Hima?” Louis asked as Harry took in their surroundings.

It was fairly big, with colorful strobe lights painting the walls and ceiling. Though it was relatively early, there were still dozens of bodies packed on the dance floor, all grinding to the beat of some Chainsmokers song. The bar was huge, lining up the back wall and practically gleaming with obscure bottles.

Harry turned to Louis and nodded, blushing when he felt Louis’ hand snake around his waist. “Can we get drinks?”

Louis smirked and nodded, bringing them to the bar. He could feel predatory gazes on him, something he should’ve been used to as Harry Styles, but it was different this time, being a woman. These eyes didn’t belong to young girls or their mothers, or even older gay men. They belonged to testosterone-filled males, all who looked like they wanted Harry for dinner. 

“What do you drink, love?” Louis asked, leaning against the counter and signalling the bartender over.

“Tequila,” Harry replied in a heartbeat, biting his lip when he felt Louis squeeze his waist. “Lou, everyone’s looking at me.”

Louis ordered their shots and then turned his attention to Harry, a deep frown settled on his pretty lips. Harry wanted to kiss it away. He looked around, which only made his frown grow. 

“Well, they can look, but they can’t touch,” Louis finally huffed, slipping his hand into Harry’s rear pocket. 

Harry was two seconds away from dying.

When they got their shots, they clinked glasses and immediately swallowed down the strong liquid. Harry didn’t drink often, usually limiting himself to wine nights with the girls or the occasional champagne at a party. He hadn’t had hard liquor since his touring days with the band.

They did four more shots, Louis having to ask Harry if he was fine after each one. Harry was determined though, he needed to loosen up in front of Louis and allow himself to have a good time. After all, this was the night he’d been dreaming about since he first realized how in love he was with the boy. So basically, he’s been waiting for this moment since he bumped into Louis in the toilets.

“Woah, you’ve had enough!” Louis chuckled as he took Harry’s glass away, causing him to pout. “Can’t have you throwing up already, can we?”

Harry only smiled when Louis touched his pout, his thumb moving across his lower lip. “Dance with me,” he told him, rather than asked. His confidence had taken a significant jump since the tequila had settled in his veins. “Please, Lou? Wanna show you my peachy bum.”

Louis’ eyes widened, and the look on his face was so adorable. Harry couldn’t help but lean in and kiss his nose.

“Yeah, yeah, let’s do that,” Louis finally said, taking his hand from Harry’s pocket and leading him towards the dance floor. 

The song had changed into something less corner, something much raunchier. It was definitely a Rihanna song, though Harry’s fuzzy mind couldn’t place it. He giggled and placed Louis’ hands on his hips then wrapped his around his neck.

“I love this song,” he said into Louis’ ear, trying to be heard over all the noise. 

Louis nodded in agreement, his blue eyes looking a bit glassy as he squeezed Harry’s hips and brought them closer. Harry let out a soft gasp when the space between them disappeared, and oh wow, that was definitely Louis’ crotch against his thigh. 

“Lou,” he whispered, his face tucked into the crook of Louis’ neck. Even though he was taller, they always fit. Even when he had his boy bits and was larger, they still always managed to come together like puzzle pieces. 

The bass was pounding in Harry’s ear, the alcohol and the beat causing his brain to become rather swimmy. He was doing things he normally would’ve been too nervous to even consider, like grind against Louis. It wasn’t even nervously or subtly, Harry was fully rolling his new wider hips against the love of his life’s and inhaling his scent, getting even more intoxicated.

“Fuck, H,” Louis groaned, slipping a thigh between Harry’s legs.

His old nickname was far more distracting than the fact that he was currently grinding on Louis’ thigh, a dream that had caused way too many sticky sheets in the morning. This wasn’t a dream though, and Louis had just called him H.

Being a girl and getting turned on was actually quite nice. It was way more subtle and less painful than when he had a dick, since nothing was hardening or causing a noticeable bulge in his jeans. It was like swallowing something very warm and feeling that tight pressure in your lower abdomen. And fuck, it was wet.

“Lou…” he whimpered, forgetting that they were in public, that Louis was well known in this club and that they could easily be photographed. It was so easy to just lose himself in this new body, and the alcohol was giving him the extra push to let go.

Louis had grabbed onto Harry’s hair, tugging down on his curls and causing Harry to look up, his lips parted and eyes closed. With all the new available skin, Louis began trailing sloppy kisses down his neck, taking his time to cover each square centimeter.

“Smell so good, babe,” he murmured, tugging harder on Harry’s hair. “Coconut? Mm, and papaya?”

_He remembered._

Harry let out an obscene moan when Louis continued to pull on his hair, something that still got him going even as a girl. It was like Louis knew, deep down, who Harry truly was, that he was hidden away in this new body. He had to have known, with the way he knew what shampoo he used, what turned him on, and just the way they clicked.

Harry had been too muddled in his own thoughts that he hadn’t even realized that Louis was quite hard. He took one look down and saw the impressive outline in his too tight jeans. Harry had seen Louis’ cock before (obviously, they’d showered together), but never under these circumstances. 

“Take me home,” Harry finally decided as Louis finished sucking a love bite to his collarbones. He wasn’t even that drunk anymore, just high off the attention and affection Louis was feeding him. He’d suffered a fucking drought until then. “Please… Lou, I need-”

Louis pulled back and looked at Harry, searching his eyes for a moment. Louis looked a bit buzzed, but they clearly both had the same dirty thoughts running through their minds. They both wanted this, and Harry was so close to passing out over that. 

Louis wanted him.

Finally.

****

It was around four in the morning when Harry woke up, everything a bit hazy except for the red numbers on the digital clock on the nightstand. He stretched his legs out, groaning softly and sitting up.

He wasn’t in his bedroom. There was also a sleeping body beside him.

His eyes widened, and he checked underneath the covers. Naked. Both of them.

_He had sex with Louis._

His eyes widened and he looked around, realizing that they were in Louis’ flat. Harry had never actually been there before, since he’d only recently purchased it, but it was quite lovely, if not a bit messy. Harry had half a mind to start tidying up when he froze.

He checked underneath the covers again. There wasn’t only one cock, but _two_.

Harry inhaled sharply, his body starting to tremble to keep from panicking. He was naked in bed with his very straight ex best friend, only now he had a dick. He also remembered that he was supposed to be on Nick’s show in a few hours, so that was another problem.

“Fuck,” he whispered as he scrambled out of bed, careful not to disturb Louis. He’d always been a light sleeper though.

As he gathered his clothes, he spotted a torn pair of pink panties by the foot of the bed. He smirked to himself, deciding to leave them, and quickly got dressed. The thing was, when he tried to pull his jeans over his thighs, they actually _split_. So much for Dolce denim. And his shirt was far too tight.

So of course, he turned to Louis’ things. He found an old pair of sweats and a shirt that he knew Louis wouldn’t miss, and he couldn’t help but smile to himself at the snug fit. He turned to admire Louis for a few more moments, lingering by the door.

He looked so calm, with his caramel hair falling over his forehead and tickling over his nose. There was a vague smile on his lips, and Harry found himself tempted to go over and kiss him goodbye with the promise of bringing breakfast in a few hours, but he just couldn’t.

It was hours later, when he was sitting in the studio with Nick, that he started feeling the consequences of the past night. He had a dozen messages from Gemma, all asking how it had gone, and he finally replied with a ‘We’ll talk later’ because he couldn’t bring himself to admit what he’d done.

He was awful. He’d literally taken advantage of his best friend, the person he loved the most outside of his family. Louis hadn’t known that it was Harry, that was his wishful thinking. Louis probably just thought he’d gotten lucky with Harry’s cousin.

God, Harry was terrible.

“Harry, you okay?” Nick asked, frowning and nudging him.

Harry covered his eyes, rubbing them like he could erase the guilt, and simply nodded. He’d been getting a bit better at lying the past couple of days.

“Yeah, ‘m fine,” he replied, his deep voice still surprising him. 

He had managed to get home and shower before making his way to the Breakfast Show. The shower had been a painful affair, his naked skin reminding him of what he couldn’t have. It was sad, knowing that Louis was so into him, only because he was a girl. Nothing else had changed, besides his body. His body had always been something he’d been comfortable with, for as long as he could remember, but now it was only a cruel reminder.

So he was now perched on a stool, wearing his chunky light brown sweater and a pair of old jeans, trying to think about anything other than what had happened. 

They went on air shortly after, and Harry was forced to put on his excited voice. Radio was always nicer than television, because at least he didn’t have to be fully aware of himself. Just his voice. They discussed the new single, Nick typically teasing him about the Taylor-esque lyrics and then asking him about his tours.

The hour flew by, and Harry was more than relieved to get out of the tiny studio. He left Nick with the promise that they’d go out soon, and then he got in a car that would take him home. He was about to call Gemma and see what she was up to, when his phone lit up with a message before he could even unlock it.

Louis.

Louis had texted him, on his personal phone. He was texting _him_ , Harry, and not Hima. He couldn’t even remember the last time Louis had texted him. That was a lie, it was when he thanked him for coming to his X-Factor performance. Then again, that had been in a group chat. He hadn’t even called him to congratulate him on the album. Most of it was dedicated to him, after all.

_Harry loved weddings, loved everything they symbolized and loved being a part of them. The fact that his best friend’s mother was getting married made him love them even more. If anyone deserved to find love, it was Johannah._

_“Harry! I’m so glad you’re here!” Jay cooed, hugging him tightly at the reception._

_He smiled widely, hoping nobody had noticed how puffy his eyes were. The vows were his favorite part, and he’d been a blubbering mess throughout the entire ceremony. His mum had to hand him her little pack of Kleenex more than once._

_“Congratulations,” he said warmly, returning the embrace. “You’re such a beautiful bride, Jay.”_

_She blushed and kissed his cheek. He always adored Louis’ mother, always seeing her as a second maternal figure, especially when they were on the X-Factor. She was always around with his own mum, snapping pictures of the pair and whispering like little old ladies behind their backs._

_She had moved on to greet some relatives, so Harry stepped aside. He had gone a bit more casual with his outfit, not bothering to tuck in the nearly unbuttoned shirt. There was a black patterned scarf hanging around his neck, and he topped everything off with a wide-brimmed hat. Daisy thought he looked like a rockstar pilgrim._

_He was sloshing his champagne around in his glass when someone suddenly squeezed his hip._

_“Drinking alone? That’s not very Harry-like,” Louis scoffed, standing beside him and taking a sip from his own glass. “Figured you’d be trailing after my mum, begging for her to throw the bouquet at you.”_

_Harry couldn’t help but giggle. “Know me so well, Lou,” he said, looking over at him fondly._

_Louis looked **good** , in his dark blue tux. His eyes were even brighter than usual, and Harry had half a mind to drag him away from the crowd to snog the shit out of him. But he couldn’t do that, because Louis had come with a date. His girlfriend, who hadn’t started out as his girlfriend. But apparently, he’d grown attached to the model they hired for him to be seen with in public. They were together for real now._

_“Where’s Eleanor, then?” Harry asked, clearing his throat and setting his now empty glass down on a table._

_Louis hummed and nodded vaguely towards his right. Harry spotted her easily, talking animatedly to Sophia. She really was lovely, and Harry felt awful for hating her so much. He couldn’t help it though, she just didn’t deserve Louis._

_“She looks beautiful,” Harry mumbled, stopping a passing waiter so he could grab another chute of champagne. He’d need a bit more if he were to be around Eleanor all day._

_Louis just nodded and turned to face Harry, lowering his Aviators. “You look like a rockstar pilgrim,” he told him, smirking and tugging on Harry’s scarf playfully. “That hat is dreadful, did you find it in your nan’s attic? Honestly, Harold.”_

_Harry couldn’t help but grin, the smile stretching wider when Louis dug his finger into his dimple. They hadn’t been this physical in months, always making sure to walk a bit further apart than usual and limit their public interactions. It was amazing and such a relief, how they could just transition back to their old ways this easily._

_“Don’t be mean, we can’t all look like Dolce models,” he told him with an eye roll. It gave him another excuse to casually check Louis out._

_“Look who’s talking, Alexander McQueen,” Louis scoffed, taking Harry’s glass and drinking nearly half of its contents._

_Harry just watched him with a goofy smile on his face. He kept his fingers crossed behind his back, hoping he’d really catch the bouquet._

Harry finally unlocked his phone to read Louis’ text.

**08:45: Hey H, I didn’t know you were in London ! Heard u were in La… anyways, heard u on grimmy’s show and just wanted to tell u that I love the new single and the entire album. Really smashed it, babes. Lmk if u wanna meet up? I can come over whenever xx**

“Oh my god!” he squeaked, causing his driver to hit the breaks. “Sorry, sorry!” 

He ignored the dirty looks and grumbles, scrambling to find his phone since he’d dropped it. It was the most Louis had said to him in ages, and it was almost like they’d never stopped talking. He’d called him _babes_ , for crying out loud.

“Oh my god,” he repeated, this time more hushed for his driver’s sake. 

Babes. 

He cleared his throat and shook his head to himself, trying to get focused. Right. One usually replies to a text message like that. 

**_08:50: Thank you so much Lou <3 Wanna see you, come over in ten? See you soon, sweet cheeks .x_ **

If Louis could call him babes, he could play just as dirty. He thanked his driver and shuffled out of the car. Once he was past the gate and in the safety of his home, he really began to freak out.

So naturally, he called Gemma.

“Your voice is back!” she exclaimed the moment Harry greeted her. He rolled his eyes as he undressed and began thumbing through the hangers in his closet. “I hope everything grew back, too.”

He smiled down at his cock, giving it a firm pat. “Mhm, everything is in order,” he said cheerfully. “So guess what?”

“You fucked Louis with your temporary vagina?”

“That, and Louis texted me. Like, me, not Hima. He’s coming over,” he told her, unable to hide his excitement. He could just hear himself smiling, it was ridiculous. “Can you believe that? He even called me babes! After fucking my cousin, he still wants to see me!”

Gemma was quiet for a minute, and Harry was about to repeat himself before she snorted. “Were you that bad of a lay? Harry, please be careful. You don’t know what’s going through his mind, and what are you going to tell him when he mentions your lovely cousin? Harry, you haven’t spoken to him in months…”

Harry frowned, his hand pausing at a beige cable-knit sweater. “So? You and Mum are always telling me that I need to be more open about my feelings. He called me babes, Gem. That has to be a good sign, right?”

She ended the call with one last ‘Be careful’ since she had to run off to work. Harry finished getting dressed, pulling on the sweater and keeping the same jeans on. He went commando, enjoying the feeling of well, _feeling_ everything.

After tidying up his bedroom and rushing down to the kitchen to make sure there wasn’t any clutter (he’d only used the space once since he’d been back, but you never know), he heard the doorbell.

Louis.

He took a deep breath, and after groping his chest to make sure it was flat, he sauntered over to the front door. He could see Louis’ outline through the glass. This was so different compared to yesterday, because he couldn’t hide now. He was Harry, and this was so important. 

He opened the door, and oh, wow.

Louis was standing there, just as he had been twelve hours ago. He looked as though he’d just gotten out of bed, his hair all tousled and contained by a dark grey beanie. He was in his typical Adidas gear, and oh, how had Harry not immediately noticed the glasses perched on his nose? 

It hurt, it was like looking at an eighteen year old Louis. Only with scruff.

“Did you get taller?” were the first words out of Louis’ mouth. 

Harry blushed, suddenly very pigeon-toed. He glanced down at his feet and looked back at Louis. “I think so? Must be all the greens I’ve been drinking,” he joked lightheartedly.

Louis scoffed, causing Harry to grin. “Disgusting,” he said, shaking his head to himself. “Can I come in, Harold?”

And so he let him in, and though there was so much tension in the air, Harry would easily suffer through it, knowing that Louis was actually speaking to him. They sat down on the couch, further apart than they would’ve ever allowed years ago. 

“So, erm, how’ve you been?” Harry finally asked, voice deeper and slower than usual when he was nervous. He tucked an invisible curl behind his ear, suddenly missing his longer curls that he could fiddle with during situations like this.

Louis shrugged, crossing his legs after toeing off his trainers. No socks. Harry smiled to himself. “Alright, I guess. I’ve been in the studio, starting to piece together my album. And uh, you know, spending time with Freddie.”

Harry looked down at his lap.

“Harry,” Louis began, sitting up a bit straighter. “Look at me.”

When he finally managed to make eye contact, Louis sighed softly.

“I’m sorry about everything. About, you know, pushing you away,” he said, and to actually hear those words, to have confirmation that it wasn’t all in Harry’s head, there was no way to describe it. Harry felt like he’d been freed of a heavy weight, but at the same time, there was more pressure building up. “I’ve really missed you. Missed us.”

“Why didn’t you tell me about Briana and Freddie?” Harry blurted out, unable to help himself. He couldn’t just accept Louis’ apology like that, not after everything he’d gone through. “I had to find out from _The Sun_ , Lou. The fucking _Sun_. Even Niall knew before me. I’ve never even met him.”

That last bit hurt to say, but it really did affect Harry. Everyone had met Freddie, had shared photos on their personal accounts and always talked about what a cute baby he was, how much he looked like Louis. Even his own mother had met the baby, when she’d been at a Tesco in London and bumped into Briana, who had been visiting. 

He didn’t resent Freddie. That would be extremely fucked up, to hate a child for existing. Of course, he was upset that Louis had been so careless and was now a father to a child that Harry had nothing to do with. But that was life, and he had to get over it.

“I know,” Louis said quietly, interrupting Harry’s internal monologue. “I’m so, so, so sorry. I just… I didn’t want you to be disappointed in me.”

Harry furrowed his brows. “I’m not your mum, Lou.”

“I know that! It’s just, you’ve always looked up to me, ever since we first met. I love my son, and I wouldn’t ever take back what happened, but I also love you, too. Telling you was scarier than telling my mum, even scarier than telling my agent. I didn’t want you to see me as this huge fuck-up,” Louis tried to explain, rocking back and forth slightly. “And it’s just, I didn’t invite you to the party because I thought maybe you hadn’t forgiven me for everything. Thought you hated me.”

Harry sniffled, his heart clenching when he heard the words _I also love you_. He didn’t mean it, not the way he’d always hoped. It was a platonic love, even brotherly. Louis didn’t want to hear about how Harry would help him raise Freddie and even buy him little football jerseys so he could match his daddy.

“Oh, fuck, are you crying?” Louis asked, exasperated as he turned to Harry. “Get over here, you big baby.”

Harry let Louis pull him close, his larger body easily folding and molding around Louis’ smaller frame. They were puzzle pieces, after all. 

“‘M not crying,” Harry whimpered, pressing his tear stained cheek against Louis’ warm neck. “Crying is lame, and ‘m not lame. ‘M cool.”

Louis chuckled softly and ran his fingers through Harry’s hair. “You’re the coolest,” he assured him, wrapping the strands around his fingers. Harry was nearly purring. “Did you cut it again? I miss your long curls.”

And that was that.

Harry nuzzled his nose into Louis’ neck, breathing in deeply. He always smelled so good. Not necessarily fruity like himself, but musky and just _sexy_. It wasn’t even a cologne, just his natural Louis scent. Harry was drunk off it.

“Guess I’m growing out my hair again,” he mumbled against Louis’ skin. “Missed you, Lou. Missed you so much. Missed snuggling.”

He couldn’t see his face, but Harry knew that Louis was smiling. He knew his cute little crinkles were visible. “Missed you more, love,” he said softly. Then he stopped petting Harry’s hair all of a sudden. “Um, H? I need to tell you something.”

Harry frowned and poked his head out from its hiding place. “What?”

Louis gulped and shifted a bit. “I, um, kind of shagged your cousin? Hima? The one staying with you. We went out last night, and she stayed over but when I woke up, she disappeared.”

Oh. Right. That happened. He blushed, thinking back to when Louis had pulled on his hair, moaning because Harry was sucking him off just right. Fuck. He couldn’t believe that actually happened.

He briefly debated on whether or not to tell him. Things were going so well, they’d basically made amends and were well on their way of becoming best mates again. Best mates, he thought bitterly. That was all they’d be, if Harry didn’t do something. Finally, after all these years, he was taking his mum and Gemma’s advice.

“Lou?” he whispered, holding onto Louis’ hand and giving it a weak squeeze. “I don’t have a cousin named Hima. Nobody was staying with me.”

Louis immediately frowned, the crinkles vanishing. “What do you mean?” he asked, brows knitting together. “Harry, I literally saw her last night. I, well, I did more than see her, if you know what I mean. She looks exactly like you! She was with Gemma.”

Harry bit his lip, pulling away a bit. “I was with Gemma yesterday,” he said so quietly, afraid that Louis hadn’t heard him. He swallowed hard, the pressure building up in his sinuses. “Lou, I don’t know what happened yesterday, I just… I came home after James’ show and when I woke up, I wasn’t in my body. It was… I was a girl? Gemma came over, and I had to convince her it was me. I showed her my birthmark and everything, you know the one below my left bum cheek? She took me shopping, and well, that’s when we saw you… And I… Lou,” he whispered, covering his eyes with his hands.

Louis didn’t say anything, and he was too afraid to see his face. He knew what would be there: betrayal, hurt, anger.

So, he continued to explain, his words literally vomiting out of him after years of repression.

“Do you know how long I’ve waited for you to look at me like that? The way you looked at me yesterday? I’ve loved you for so long, always wanted only you. No matter who they made me be seen with, no matter who they say my songs are about, it’s always you at the end of the day. It’s always been you, since I splashed my pee on you in the loo seven years ago. I’m so sorry I lied to you and took advantage of you, it was awful of me and I’ll never forgive myself. But Louis, these last few years have been the hardest of my life. It felt so… so good to finally be noticed by you after all this time. Unfortunately, it took tits for that to happen, which I don’t typically have, so I’m so, so sorry.”

He was practically hyperventilating now, his hands still covering his eyes as though they were playing some twisted game of hide and seek. Fat tears streaked his splotchy cheeks, and his shoulders wouldn’t stop shaking.

Louis finally spoke.

“We… Wow,” he finally said. Harry still refused to uncover his eyes, so he couldn’t see how angry Louis looked. “You’re telling me that you were the one who gave me the best sex of my life?”

And… Oh.

Harry finally peeled his hands away, blinking several times to adjust his vision. He wiped away some tears and looked at Louis, shocked that he didn’t look the least bit angry. He actually seemed… Amused? 

“What?” was all Harry could utter. “Louis, I took _advantage_ of you. Why aren’t you beating me up? Or at least calling me crazy? I’m telling you that I had a vagina yesterday!”

Louis snorted and reached forward to wipe Harry’s tears away with his thumbs. “Harold, first of all, you didn’t take advantage of me. I more than wanted to get into your pants, believe me. And second, I could never beat you up. You bruise like a peach! And third, weirder shit has happened. Didn’t you hear that I’m a dad?”

Harry couldn’t believe it, couldn’t understand how Louis wasn’t furious with him. Wasn’t it him who tweeted that their relationship was a load of bullshit? Wasn’t it him who announced his rather boring sexuality to the entire world?

“B-But… I’m a boy now,” Harry said, forehead creasing as he tried to make sense of this. “You don’t like boys. You certainly don’t like me…”

Louis huffed then, and before Harry could even look up, he had grabbed his face in his hands and pulled him in roughly, their lips crashing together in an earth shattering kiss. It certainly shattered Harry’s world. It was sloppy and close mouthed, but it was everything Harry needed.

Louis pulled away, but made sure to press a reassuring peck to Harry’s lips, before finally settling back in his seat. Harry wasn’t having it, his inner baby coming out, as he crawled into Louis’ lap. 

The older boy laughed and tangled a hand in Harry’s hair. “You’re right, I don’t like boys. But I love you,” he told him, gently tugging on the strands. “Don’t even like girls, babes. You’ve always been the one for me.”

Harry tilted his head to the side. “You fucked a girl last night, Lou. I was the girl, yeah, but still…”

Louis rolled his eyes and squeezed Harry’s hip with his other hand. “Because she looked so much like you, you donk. Maybe I knew deep down that it was you, I dunno. Harry, haven’t you noticed that other bro pals don’t exactly act the way that we do?”

Harry frowned. “What’s wrong with the way we act?”

Louis smiled and kissed his cheek. “Absolutely nothing, and I’m sorry it’s taken me seven years to figure that out. So sorry for hurting you, baby cakes. I love you so much. Never loved anyone as much as I love you.”

Louis’ words were only fueling Harry’s love for him. He was finally getting a hurricane after his drought. His mum and Gemma were right all along (not that he’d ever tell that to Gem, bless her), he really should’ve spoken to Louis earlier. Shit, Louis loved him the same way Harry loved him.

It was bananas.

“Also, Taylor doesn’t have tattoos,” Louis said after a moment of admiring the stupid grin on Harry’s face.

“Hm? Who’s Taylor?”

Louis chuckled and pinched Harry’s nipple through his sweater. “Same lips red, same eyes blue, same white shirt, couple more tattoos? I wonder who you could possibly be singing about, dear Harold.”

Harry blushed instantly. He knew Louis would figure it out. Louis had always known, all along.

“Finally remember how it feels to have a heartbeat?”

Harry placed Louis’ hand on his chest. 

“It’s always been beating for you, Louis. I’m just finally hearing it again.”

****

_“See you later, loves!” Harry called out to the three ladies of MUNA as they retreated to their own hotel rooms down the hall._

_They’d just finished a show in Boston, and Harry wanted nothing more than to return to a bed. He’d probably facetime Louis for a bit, maybe squeeze in a quick wank, and then pass the fuck out. It was a good idea to start off with more intimate venue shows. He’d forgotten how exhausting touring could be._

_A few things had changed in three months. His hair was a big longer, able to be tied up in a little bun (“You look like an onion, Harold. Can’t believe I’m dating an onion. Does that make me an ogre?”), and he was now publicly dating Louis Tomlinson, the new face of Adidas. It was crazy how things had turned out, how he could’ve just come out behind his management’s back all these years. It just took one little tweet._

_**Harry_Styles: Hi everyone. I love @Louis_Tomlinson so much, so proud he’s finally getting the recognition he deserves. Congrats on Adidas, baby cakes.** _

_It was bananas._

_He slid in his keycard and pushed open the door, expecting to be greeted with darkness and cool white sheets. Well, the sheets were definitely there._

_His eyes widened as he took in the scene in front of him. Candles were on every surface, surely screaming ‘fire hazard.’ There were even pink petals scattered across the king-sized bed in the center of the room. No other light was present other than the dim flickering of the candles. It was unbelievably sexy and romantic, and what really tied the bow was the man perched on the bed._

_“Certainly took you long enough!” Louis huffed, standing up and walking towards Harry. “Do you know how many times I’ve burned myself?”_

_Harry was sure his lips were going to split, that’s how wide he was smiling. His stomach was probably going to explode too, from all the butterflies. “What are you doing here, Lou?” he asked, wrapping his arms around Louis’ neck after dropping his bag by his feet._

_Louis turned them around and began walking them over to the bed, pushing Harry down onto the mattress and disturbing the petals. Harry was sure they didn’t mind. He looked up at Louis, who was standing between his legs._

_“Can’t I visit my amazingly talented boyfriend?” he huffed, leaning down and hovering over Harry. “Got tired of seeing your pretty cock on my phone screen, babes,” he finally admitted when Harry gave him that look._

_Harry giggled and leaned up to close the distance between their lips. Kissing Louis was easily better than any tequila or wine in the world. It could cure world hunger, accomplish gender equality… But most of all, it made Harry happy._

_“Fuck, I missed that,” Louis murmured against his lips, fisting Harry’s curls in his hand. The simple maneuver caused Harry to part his lips instantly for Louis._

_“Show me how much you missed me,” Harry breathed, letting out a small squeak when Louis suddenly flipped him over so that he was now lying on his belly and Louis was straddling his upper thighs._

_“Gonna do more than that, pumpkin.” Louis smirked and tugged Harry’s shirt off, making Harry wonder why they weren’t already naked to begin with. He felt Louis pull on his trousers._

_“Don’t stretch the fabric, Lou. That’s Gucci,” Harry scolded, raising his hips so Louis could easily slide the pants down. “You’re the face of a clothing company now, gotta start respecting clothes.”_

_Harry couldn’t see it, but he knew Louis had rolled his eyes and possibly even flipped him off. “Shut the fuck up, there’s a clear distinction between Gucci and Adidas,” he snapped, his hands already kneading Harry’s ass._

_Harry didn’t need to be told twice, already letting out close-mouthed moans of approval. He stopped wearing underwear a long time ago, probably when he wanted to ride Louis in the passenger seat of his Mercedes. Briefs had delayed that lovely half hour, so they were the enemy._

_“Missed you so fucking much,” Louis said quietly, and Harry wasn’t sure if he was talking to him or to his bum._

_Before he could ask for a clarification, Louis had spread his cheeks and went face-first. Harry gasped and grabbed a pillow, burying his face into the plushness to keep from waking up all of the guests._

_“Fuck, Lou-” Harry whined, trying to arch his back so that he could meet Louis’ tongue each time it flicked and circled around his rim. “Feels so, so, so good, oh my god…”_

_Louis was taking his time, apparently wanting to spend all night showing Harry just how much he had missed him. He was licking long stripes down his bum, tongue always just missing his entrance. Harry was practically humping Louis’ face, always hating but secretly loving when Louis teased him like this._

_“Harold,” Louis scolded, grabbing Harry’s hips and digging his blunt nails into the fleshy skin. “Stay still. Now.”_

_Harry instantly stopped wriggling, his breath catching whenever Louis used that tone with him. “Yes, daddy,” he mumbled into the pillow._

_Louis smiled and gave Harry’s birth mark a soft kiss and his bum a gentle pat. “Good baby,” he cooed, causing Harry to beam. “Let daddy take care of you.”_

_There was no warning, Louis simply dove back in, but this time, there was no teasing. Harry had to bite down on his fingers when he felt Louis’ tongue prod at his rim before finally pushing inside._

_It was obscene, the way Louis alternated between fucking him with his tongue and sucking bruises into his fleshy bum. Harry’s knees were trembling, and fuck, he was so hard that he desperately wanted to grind down into the mattress for some relief, but that meant pulling away from Louis’ tongue._

_“L-Lou, please, touch me,” Harry begged, so close to tears when he felt the pre-cum leak from his tip. He was so wet, and Louis was torturing him. It was inhumane. “Daddy, please, been such a good boy, need you so badly…”_

_Suddenly Louis’ tongue disappeared. Harry let out a long whimper, thinking Louis was punishing him, but he shut up the moment he heard a bottle being uncapped._

_“Flip over,” Louis ordered, and Harry did just that._

_He looked up at Louis through hooded eyes, his lips swollen and red even in the dim lighting. Louis looked absolutely beautiful, the candlelight making his skin appear ethereal. He was glowing, with his messy fringe sticking up and his expressive mouth parted as he stared down at him. Harry shivered, his body trembling with anticipation._

_Louis knelt down between Harry’s spread legs and lifted one and set it over his shoulder, his foot now high in the air. He had squeezed in extra yoga sessions ever since he and Louis started exploring their sexual relationship, and it was fair to say that Louis was pleased with the results. Harry had even witnessed Louis stopping to thank Harry’s instructor, slipping her a gift card._

_Harry watched in a haze as Louis lubed up three fingers and chucked the bottle side. He wanted to reach down and get a hand on his cock, but he wanted to please Louis even more, so his arms remained spread out._

_“Lou, please,” Harry finally blurted, getting too impatient. He suddenly gasped when he felt Louis grab his other leg, tossing it over his other shoulder, folding his body perfectly._

_The first finger was always annoying to get used to, but Louis had made sure to use a lot of lube and he was already wet from his tongue from earlier, so it didn’t take quite as long. He was practically gagging for it after ten seconds._

_“More, please,” he whimpered, knowing how much it turned Louis on when he used his manners during sex. “Please, please, please. Another.”_

_Louis smiled down at him sweetly, turning to press light kisses to his thighs. He pulled out his index finger and pushed it back in with his middle one. He gave him nice, deep thrusts at first as he sucked love bites into Harry’s gorgeous thighs._

_“Love opening you up, love seeing you like this spread out for me,” Louis murmured against Harry’s quivering skin. He started to spread his fingers, scissoring them which got Harry arching his back and practically begging to be fucked._

_Harry was a blubbering mess, having absolutely no control over the words spilling from his lips._

_“Oh my god, feels so fucking good, Lou, o-oh my god, fuck,” he moaned, gasping when Louis easily slipped in the third finger. When he spread them out like a W, Harry was gone. “Please, daddy, please fuck me, need you inside me, wanna feel you stretching me, just wanna be good… Please.”_

_Louis smirked and slowly pulled his fingers out. They’d both gotten their screenings done a month into their relationship when they realized they kept forgetting to stash condoms around their home (Louis had moved in a week after their confessions), and now there was no need. Harry trusted Louis more than anyone, and it was safe to say that it was mutual._

_They’ve discussed it._

_Louis wrapped a hand around his cock, slicking himself up as he watched Harry’s hole flutter, grasping at nothing but air, before him. Harry was already writhing, looking nothing less than the picture of perfection._

_“Just because you said please,” Louis hummed, grabbing onto Harry’s legs as he lined himself up with Harry’s entrance._

_Harry took a deep breath and only released it when Louis was buried several inches within him. It was always a stretch, no matter how much prep they did because Louis was just so thick. He tried to control his breathing, using some techniques he’d learned from yoga, as Louis finally bottomed out._

_“Alright, darling?” Louis whispered, finally leaning down to bump his nose against Harry’s. “You’re so fucking beautiful, you know that? My gorgeous Harry.”_

_Harry whimpered, nodding at the praise. “Yours,” he confirmed hoarsely, a smile forming on his lips as Louis kissed him sweetly._

_He finally nodded, giving Louis the signal that it was okay to move. Louis pressed a kiss to Harry’s nose and pulled out slowly only to thrust his whole length back in. Harry loved it like that, loved it when Louis just gave it to him. Louis always just knew._

_“Oh my god,” Harry cried out when Louis began building up a steady but fast rhythm, his thrusts getting deeper each time and always just missing his prostate. “Y-You’re teasing me again!”_

_Louis managed to chuckle, though it sounded really strained as he angled his hips differently, feeling Harry’s legs tighten around his waist. “Now why would I do that?” he asked, though it was more like a growl. “Don’t you know that daddy takes care of-”_

_Harry didn’t hear the last bit, his cock twitching and his body arching off the mattress when Louis finally hit it. “Holy **fuck** ,” he nearly yelled, throwing his head back and allowing himself to roll a nipple between his fingers for some relief. “Please, oh my god, do that again-”_

_He didn’t have to ask, because Louis was now fucking into him nice and hard, hitting the velvet spot each time. He took one look at Harry playing with his own nipples and groaned, squeezing his eyes shut. “You filthy little minx,” he mumbled, finally getting a hand around Harry’s cock and circling his thumb around the head._

_It was all suddenly too much for Harry, with his nipple, his cock, and Louis practically splitting him in half. He could tell Louis was close, from the way he was taking short and shallow breaths and how his thrusts were getting slower yet deeper, stroking him in the best possible way._

_They came together and when Louis pulled out, Harry pouted as usual._

_“Babe, I can’t stay in there forever,” Louis told him, rolling his eyes and collapsing onto the bed beside him._

_Harry curled up into his arms, knowing they’d have to take a shower soon since he was practically leaking Louis’ cum, but for now, this was perfect._

_“Want you there forever though,” Harry murmured, smiling to himself when Louis wrapped both arms around his body. “But this is also fine.”_

_Louis hummed in agreement, burying his face in Harry’s curls. “Love you, princess.”_

_“Love you too, Lou.”_

“I love you so much,” Harry whispered as he stood in front of Louis underneath a gorgeous archway woven with colorful flowers. “I’ve loved you the moment I first met you, and I’ve never stopped all these years. It hasn’t been easy, because love isn’t supposed to be. But you’re my best friend, and no matter what you get yourself into, it’s okay because you’ll always have me, no matter what. I can’t be sure what our journey will be like, but I can tell you that I know we’ll always be together.”

Louis was tearing up, though he tried to hide it.

“You’re a part of me, Lou. We’re two hearts in one home. I love you so much,” he finished, barely even hearing the officiant announce that they were now Mr. and Mr. Tomlinson. 

Louis grabbed Harry’s face the instant they were allowed to do so, and he kissed the life out of him. The applause, whistles, and ‘aww’s were just background noise to Harry’s heart beating out of control.

“Can’t believe you put your lyrics in our vows, you beautiful idiot,” Louis whispered fondly, continuing to peck Harry’s lips.

Harry giggled, wrapping one arm around Louis’ neck while his other hand clutched as his bouquet of sunflowers. 

“I love you, my sweet creature.”

**Author's Note:**

> find me on twitter: @[BABYKlWl](https://twitter.com/babyklwl)
> 
> leave a comment/kudos if u enjoyed!!! thank u sm for reading xo


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